Managing to eat according to my diabetes is becoming easier. The home-oriented life I get to lead right now; letting the Boy have the car all day, not having to run here and there and everywhere... it helps. I've got an easy breakfast menu in my routine, I've gotten the hang of making sure my lunch is nearly all protein. By keeping the breakfast in limits I can control the glucose reading. If I "pass" breakfast and lunch I can eat moderately safely at dinner and pass. For someone who hearts carbs the way I do, keeping them in check is very hard. I know it can be done, I'm working on ways to make the foods I can eat more palatable and yummy to me.

It doesn't help that I'm still fighting that fasting number. One suggestion that I've heard is that my overnight sugar might be bottoming out and then rebounding, giving me a floppy number. This explains why, when I pig out on a higher sugar item at bedtime my number gets closer to the target. Last night I tried to eat more, and got up when the Boy did this morning to check my glucose. And it was, in fact, pretty low. When I got up at the normal time the number was high again. Tonight I'm going to try to do it again and see what happens. What irritates me the most is that it's trial and error.

Seems to me, sometimes, that everything in my life is trial and error. One big science experiment. Will one thing work, or another? Everything I do turns into a lesson of how to/how not to do things. Eating a certain food brings my sugar up. Eating something else seems counterproductive but results in lower numbers. I learn that it's about the numbers, about eating and exercising how I have to in order to produce the right numbers at the right time. If the numbers are right my blood sugar is balanced and the diabetes is considered under control. If the numbers are not right I feel lousy and either vow to try harder or throw my hands up and binge on ice cream.