Saturday, February 16, 2008

What's the old saying, home and hearth something? I feel so domestic when I'm sitting up after the household is in bed, watching something or other on tv and doing a bit of hand sewing. Tonight it's the finishing of a flannel nightgown. And yes, I know that this has only been on my sewing bench since July or so. I've been a bit busy this past 6 months.

My little boy is still working on eating and growing. He just doesn't seem able to feed all on his own yet. It's still every other feed through the nipple and the rest through the tube, and part of some of those nipple feeds he won't finish. I'm ready for him to be home. I'm ready to start this next chapter in our lives. Ask me again if I'm this ready in a month or so, after the sleepless nights add up and drive me nutty.

I just am so dead tired already. Can't sleep a whole lot in the morning, never past 6. Can't fall asleep before 11 this week. Keep telling myself to take a sleeping pill just to enforce some of that rest. I don't know how to make that happen. I tell myself to do it then don't because what if I'm needed? What if I've got to wake up and tend to the family? The Toddler? What if something happens?

I've got to stop. Really. I just don't know how to let go of things this week.

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