Sunday, May 21, 2006

I need to grow up. I just lost it. I'm extremely PISSED at the Boy right now, and I can't even put it into words. All I can do is blither on about nothing. It's possible that it's not even him that I'm mad at- he's just the most convenient target.

This morning I found that I can't hold a conversation without bringing up the KittyCat. I can't go for more than five minutes without bringing her prematurity or my false teeth into the spotlight. I proudly declare that she was 9 weeks early. That she weighed 2 and a half pounds. That I have false teeth on both the top and the bottom, and that the dentist who did it was a genius. So I guess that I'm mad at myself for turning into this person. I used to read the news obsessively, and I could discuss most things with the Boy. I could talk about intelligent, grownup type things. Now I can't talk about anything but the baby. I'm not his wife anymore, I'm the nanny. Just a glorified executive assistant, sending him reports and pictures every day. And I'm tired of it. I'm just wishing that I was still more than that.

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